FROM: Group Offices London
TO: All Spanish Staff
SUBJECT: Improper Language Usage
It's been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our headquarters that the Spanish staff commonly uses offensive language.
Such behaviour, in addition to violating our group's policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and the staff itself.
Therefore it is requested to our Spanish staff to adhere immediately to the following rules:
1. Foreign colleagues or visitors should not be referred to as "
mira ese guiri de mierda".
2. Words like "
coño", "
joder", and other such expressions will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion is.
3. You will not say "
la ha cagao" when someone makes a mistake, or "
la esta cagando" if you see somebody being reprimanded, or "
¡que cagada!"
when major mistake has been made. All direct or derived forms of the verb "
cagar" are inappropriate in our environment.
4. No Project Manager, Section Supervisor or Head of Administration Chief, will be referred to, under any circumstances, as "
hijo de la gran puta", or "
el muy cabron" or even "
comemierda".
5. Lack of determination will not be referred as to "
falta de huevos"
or "
mariconería" nor will persons with a lack of initiative be ever referred to "
capullo" or "
acojonado".
6. Unusual and/or creative ideas shall not be referred to as "
pajas mentales" in particular when they stem from your manager.
7. You will not say "
como me jode" if a person is persistent, or "
esta jodido" or "
se lo van a follar" if a colleague is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, when matters become complicated the words "
que jodienda" should not be used.
8. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say "
vete a tomar por culo", nor should you ever substitute the most educated "
may I help you?" with "
¿que coño quieres ahora?"
9. If things get tough, an acceptable expression such as we are going through a difficult time should be used rather than "
esto esta jodido"
or "
nos van a follar a todos". Additionally, if you make a mistake, just say so and do not say "
que putada" or any expressions composed with the root "
puta".
10. No salary increase shall ever be referred to as "
subida de mierda".
11. Last, but not least, after reading this note please do not say "
me voy a limpiar el culo con ella" or "
me la paso por el forro de los cojones".
Just keep it clean and odorless and dispose of it properly.
Leido en la web de la Asociación de Internautas.
Aprovecho un respiro para postear algo de lo mucho que me gustaria comentar.
Me encantaria decir que no escribo porque estoy de vacaciones o porque estoy disfrutando como un cosaco de mi tiempo libre, pero la verdad es que tengo un marron de impresion en el curro y se me quitan las ganas de todo.
Puedes ser mi padre o mi madre, que me disteis la vida.
Ha pasado varias veces, o quizas no tantas, pero esta mañana mientras desayunaba viendo el telediario algo me ha parecido escuchar.
Paso, no se ni para que leo los periodicos, y menos con noticias como esta.
En este link puedes calcular (de manera aproximada) tu edad real y tu esperanza de vida, ambas cosas basadas en tu edad actual y lo mucho/poco que te cuidas.
... pero no se lo cuentes a nadie, vale?
10 respuestas acertadas
Recordando el tiempo que estuve en Edimburgo acabo de recordar que se me olvido comentar algo muy importante.
Alguien nos esta horneando fijo, o al menos asi es como me siento yo.
